October 2010

Protect Kids From False Beliefs

Many parents worry about shielding their children from dangerous non-Christian influences. This is especially true at Halloween, which has become a $6 billion holiday. Because of the costumes and candy, most children adore Halloween. But parents face a dilemma: How much should children participate in a holiday that focuses on scary images often glamorizing death and the occult?

Avoiding Halloween entirely is one option. Another is providing Christian alternatives such as harvest events. Parents can also provide children with a faith-based understanding of Halloween. You can use the holiday to discover the differences between God’s truth and false beliefs. Here are ways to start:

***Explore children’s fears regarding death. Kids often ask tough questions that make adults uncomfortable. When topics such as death and the devil arise, let your home be a safe place where children can express their fears. Then turn to the Bible for answers.

***Share with children the history of Halloween. The holiday first marked the eve of All Hallows or All Saints’ Day, when Christians remember saints who’ve died. Talk about special family members or friends who are now in heaven with Jesus. Also share that all who believe in Jesus are called to be saints, or holy people (see Romans 1:7).

***Put on the “armor of God” as protection against evil. Read aloud Ephesians 6:10-20 and discuss how God keeps us safe. Let children dress up in this armor; for example, wear the belt of truth to recognize Satan’s lies and resist his temptations.

Trick or Truth?
• According to a recent Gallup Poll, one in 10 Americans objects to celebrating Halloween because of religious beliefs. In a poll at about.com, 40% of respondents said Halloween activities are harmless and fun.

• At edutopia.org, 52% of poll respondents said public schools should celebrate Halloween and that children whose parents object should be excused from the festivities. Another 41% said an alternative seasonal festival should include everyone.


Ask God:
1. To help you teach and remind children of God’s truths.

2. To protect your children from evil forces and activities.

3. To help your children learn to resist Satan’s temptations.

Parenting Insights
Start now to safeguard children against being misled by the false teachings of cults.

1. Love and accept children unconditionally. Show them that church is the place to find God’s love and acceptance.

2. Teach children to think critically. They must know what they believe and why.

3. Expect and encourage kids to question their faith. Doubts help spur faith growth.

4. Teach kids to understand the Bible. Always look at the context of verses.

5. Talk to children about false religions. Otherwise, they’ll be unprepared to evaluate and respond to cults when they’re out on their own.

6. Pray and trust the Holy Spirit. God promises to keep his children safe in his truth.



“Jesus told him, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.”
John 14:6

Jesus, our Savior, is the only source of truth and the only way to eternal life.

Teachable Moments

1. Bible Villains—Put a biblical spin on children’s interest in “bad guys” by learning more about Bible-time villains such as Pharaoh, Goliath, Bathsheba, Delilah, Haman, Pilate, and Judas. Discuss these people’s actions and how we can avoid being like them.

2. Reverse Trick or Treat—Surprise neighbors with an unexpected act of kindness. Bake some goodies and deliver them by ringing doorbells and saying, “Reverse trick or treat!” As you walk from home to home, talk about biblical truths such as the Golden Rule—and why God tells us to love our neighbors.

3. Let It Shine—Make some luminarias by decorating brown paper sacks and filling them each with sand and a votive candle. Line them along your sidewalk to light a path to faith in Christ at Halloween. Read aloud Isaiah 9:2 and share ways you can help others see the light of Jesus all year long.

Talk about children’s fears and beliefs by using these conversation-starting questions:

1. What kinds of things frighten you the most, and why? Why do you think Jesus tells us to not be afraid (see John 6:20)?

2. What makes you feel better when you’re scared? How do you comfort other people when they’re facing fears?

3. How can you tell when other people are telling the truth?

4. Why does Jesus want us to live according to his truth found in the Bible? How can we make sure we do that?

Family Experience: Nothing But the Truth
Use these activities to discover where we can find real truth. The first works well with younger children, and the second works well with older children.
• Pumpkin Matchup—Remove the seeds and pulp from two pumpkins. Carve them together, reserving large pieces from your designs. Place all the pieces on a tray in the center of the room. Place the carved pumpkins at opposite ends of the room. Then form two teams and have teams each stand by a pumpkin. Say: “Let’s complete our pumpkins. Race to match your team’s pieces to your pumpkin. If a piece doesn’t fit, return it to the pile. Afterward, say: “It isn’t always easy to find the right match for things.” Read 1 John 2:5. Say: “Jesus wants us to do things that match up with the Bible. Following Jesus makes us complete.”

• Searching for the Truth—Fill a large tub with ice cubes and 20 or 30 clear marbles. Have family members try to pick up the marbles with their bare toes. Ask: “How easy or difficult was this task? How were the marbles different from or similar to the ice? How is distinguishing between marbles and ice cubes with your toes like or unlike deciding what’s true and what isn’t?” Say: “What’s false often looks or feels like truth. Just as our feet got cold and numb from the ice while we were looking for the marbles, sometimes false things can make us numb to the truth. The best way to know truth is to pick up and hold on to God’s Word.” Read aloud Psalm 119:105 and discuss ways that God’s Word lights our path and warms our hearts. Then enjoy a warm snack.

Help “De-stress” Your Children

Back-to-school season, while exciting, can be unsettling for young students. They may worry about facing new teachers, classrooms, and classmates. Other children feel stressed because of busy schedules or high expectations that they or their parents set.

Preteens report that school, homework, and grades are their top causes of stress. Feeling like they have to be perfect just adds to some children’s anxiety. Signs of perfectionism include being afraid to fail or take risks, never being satisfied with one’s success, feeling insecure, and lacking flexibility. Here are some tips for helping children realize when “good enough” is good enough:

*Encourage children to enjoy the process rather than just the outcome. Emphasize that the important part of school is to have fun learning, practicing, and doing, rather than being an immediate expert. It’s okay to dream big, regardless of the outcome.

*Provide age-appropriate tasks to build confidence. To prevent frustration and getting “stuck,” show children how to tackle achievable tasks one at a time.

*Accept “good enough” yourself. Try not to dwell on children’s mistakes. Offer many more comments about what they’re doing right than about what they’re doing wrong. Talk about times you’ve done your best and been satisfied with a less-than-perfect outcome.

Me, Worry?
• 31% of children ages 9 to 12 say they “worry a lot,” and 47% suffer from insomnia. (Children’s Ministry Magazine)

• Children whose family lives are stressful are nearly twice as likely as other kids to have low levels of school engagement and four times as likely to have behavioral and emotional problems.
(“Stressful Family Lives” by Kristin Moore & Sharon Vandivere)

• About 14% of children ages 5 to 12 spend an average of about one hour alone at home after school. Kids left alone tend to have more difficulty handling school assignments.
(momdadchat.com)


Ask God:
1. To help your children have a positive school year.

2. To help you and your children manage life’s stresses.

3. To help you resist the urge to be a “perfect” parent.


Parenting Insights
Psychologist Les Parrott III, writing in Children’s Ministry Magazine, offers these ways to lower children’s stress levels:

1. Take care of your stress. Monitor your stress level and protect yourself from running on empty. Take time to relax and find social support.

2. Model coping skills. Keep calm when problems arise because children will follow your example.

3. Acknowledge children’s feelings. Help them find words and “I” statements to express their frustrations.

4. Accept stress as normal. Jesus told his disciples they’d face troubles. But it’s possible to turn stressful times into times of growth.

5. Know when to seek help. When children’s stress turns to panic, consult a professional.



“Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.”
1 Peter 5:7

Jesus warns that his followers will face earthly trials, but he also promises to protect and comfort us. Because our loving God is in control, we can put all our anxieties on his shoulders.

Teachable Moments

1. Under Pressure—Give family members each an inflated balloon, and have them gradually step on it as everyone calls out stresses and pressures. When all balloons are broken, read aloud Philippians 4:6 and share ways that God helps us deal with stress.

2. Puzzled—Work on a jigsaw puzzle and talk about the challenges of putting all the pieces of a puzzle—and life—together. Read aloud Luke 1:37 and discuss how Jesus helps us solve even the toughest problems.

3. Built to Last—Together, use blocks or LEGOS to make as tall of a tower as possible. Talk about why your creation always falls down and why our efforts to be perfect will always fail. Then discuss ways that God is our sturdy foundation and how we can stand tall in him.


Help your children open up about stress and perfectionism by asking these discussion-starter questions:

1. What excites and worries you about going back to school?

2. What good does it do to worry about things we can’t control? What are some ways we can hand our worries to God?

3. What are some things you try to do “just right,” and why? How do you feel when you mess up?

4. How do you know when you’ve done your best or when something is “good enough”? How can you be satisfied with that?

Family Experience: Putting It in Perspective

Try these fun activities to put problems and priorities in place:

• Lift Your Hearts—With permanent marker, draw a heart on a hard-boiled egg. Pour ½ cup salt into a paper cup with “Jesus” written on the side. Fill a clear jar half full of water. Hold the egg so everyone can see the heart. Say: “Sometimes our hearts feel heavy with worries. What are some worries you have?” As you drop the egg into the jar of water, say: “Worries make our hearts sink inside us. But Jesus can take away those worries.” Pour the salt into the jar and stir the water for a while. Read aloud Matthew 11:28-30. When the egg rises to the top and floats, say: “When we give our worries to Jesus, our hearts become lighter.” Close in prayer.

• Balancing Act—Align the edge of a book exactly along a table edge. Ask: “What are some of your responsibilities? Sometimes it seems like we can’t get everything done in a day. Each responsibility puts us a bit closer to being over the edge.” Place a second book atop the first so it hangs one inch beyond the edge of the first—and over the table edge. List responsibilities as you keep placing three more books in the same manner. Ask: “How could I place each of these books without any of them falling? What would happen if I moved the bottom one?” Move it and watch the books fall. Read aloud 2 Chronicles 27:6. Say: “A priority is something that’s more important than another thing.” Ask: “What could happen if we don’t keep our priorities in order? How can keeping our priorities straight help us deal with life’s stresses?”