May 2011
God, our Creator, has a plan and purpose for every life.
According to the National Organization on Disability, 54 million Americans have a disability. That’s one in every five people. And a significant number of them are children. Many churches now have special-needs ministries, and more kids with disabilities are being mainstreamed into school classrooms. That means your children likely spend time with kids they may consider “different.”
Use these tips to emphasize everyone’s worth:
• Build relationships. Show your children that it’s okay to talk to people with disabilities and to treat them as you would treat anyone else. Introduce yourself to parents of special-needs children and discover what types of assistance they could use.
• Clarify misconceptions. Children notice differences, so address their already-established stereotypes and oversimplified generalizations about groups of people. Watch and correct judgmental statements and actions. Be a role model by valuing diversity, celebrating individuality, and respecting differences.
Discuss people’s unique needs by using these conversation-starting questions:
1. Why do you think God made people with different appearances, gifts, and abilities?
2. How do you feel and react to someone who’s different from you?
3. What’s the best way to respond when other people point out your weaknesses or flaws?
4. What types of things can we learn from people who are different from us? How can we get to know them better?
POWERSOURCE
ASK GOD:
1. To help your children look beyond differences to see that God made everyone in a special way.
2. To give your children compassionate hearts and helping hands for people with special needs.
3. To show how you can assist families dealing with disabilities.
RESEARCH INSIGHTS
• About 90% of families with a special-needs child are unchurched. (pastors.com)
• According to various sources, divorce rates for couples who have a special-needs child are as high as 75% or 85%.
• In the United States, an estimated 100,000 children are waiting to be adopted, and many of them have special needs.
“The human body has many parts, but the many parts make up one whole body. So it is with the body of Christ. … Our bodies have many parts, and God has put each part just where he wants it. … Some parts of the body that seem weakest and least important are actually the most necessary.”
(1 Corinthians 12:12, 18, 22)
Teachable Moments
1. Lovely Reflections—With babies and toddlers, hold up a mirror so they can see their reflection. Show them that everyone looks different in a mirror but emphasize that everyone is special—regardless of skin color or appearance.
2. Role-Plays—Help children practice what they might do or say in real-life situations. Propose various encounters with children who have different challenges. Then debrief each role-play to point out the positive things children did or said.
3. Special Friends—Seek out people in your family, church, or neighborhood who are coping with physical challenges. Spend time with them as a family, providing assistance and companionship. These low-key experiences will show children how much they have in common with people who appear to be different from them. Discuss people’s unique needs by using these conversation-starting questions:
1. Why do you think God made people with different appearances, gifts, and abilities?
2. How do you feel and react to someone who’s different from you?
3. What’s the best way to respond when other people point out your weaknesses or flaws?
4. What types of things can we learn from people who are different from us? How can we get to know them better?
FAMILY EXPERIENCE
Learn valuable lessons with these fun activities:
• In Full Bloom—You'll need chenille craft wires and various colors of tissue paper cut into 10x20-inch wide strips. Have family members stack six tissue paper strips and then smooth them flat. Fold the stacks lengthwise, accordion-style, in 2-inch sections, making five folds. Then twist a wire tightly around the center of the accordion-folded paper. To create the blossoms, spread the folds on both sides of the wire and gently pull each layer of tissue paper toward the center. When all the layers have been pulled, a beautiful flower blossom remains. Read aloud Psalm 139:13-14. Ask: “How are all our flowers like the people God made? What would it be like if every flower looked the same or if every person looked the same? What traits or characteristics set you apart from everyone else?”
• Mixed Together—You’ll need a bowl of cookie dough, some flour, an egg, a spoon, and a variety of chips and sprinkles. Hold up the flour and egg, and ask: “Who’d like to try these ingredients? How can these ingredients become something that tastes better?” Say: “We need to mix these with other ingredients.” Read aloud 1 Corinthians 12:14-17, 27. Say: “What would happen if we left out an ingredient from our recipe? What would happen if one of us wasn’t part of our family or church?” Hand out cookie dough so each person can add chips and sprinkles. Then bake the cookies. While enjoying them, discuss ways that all of you are important “ingredients.”
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Monday, February 28, 2011
Help Kids Use Positive Language
As the Bible describes in James 3, the tongue may be small, but it can do an awful lot of damage. Unfortunately, name-calling, cursing, bickering, whining, and putdowns find their way into most homes. Yet our words also have the power to heal, mend rifts, encourage other people, and praise God. Proverbs 25:11 (NIV) compares well-chosen and well-timed words to “apples of gold in settings of silver.”
This month’s newsletter explores ways to get your children talking in positive, God-pleasing ways. Use these tips to get started:
Walk the walk, talk the talk. Kids are listening, so watch your own language and model appropriate talk—even when you think little ears aren’t listening.
Teach children how to apologize. Hurtful words can’t be “unsaid,” but people can offer heartfelt apologies and change their ways. Offer examples of how to say sorry, and remember to seek children’s forgiveness when you mess up.
Listen up! Proverbs 10:19 contains valuable advice that often goes unheeded: “Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.” Help children understand the importance of stopping to think before you speak. When in doubt, it’s always better to seal your lips rather than say something you may regret.
Praise God throughout the day. Talk frequently about how good God is and thank him for his many blessings. Share favorite Bible passages, pray with one another, and brainstorm ways you can serve God and other people. When we focus on God and good words, our mouths and lives will bear good fruit.
Ask God:
1. To help you and your kids use positive, God-pleasing words.
2. To guard your tongue from temptations to curse or use his name in vain.
3. To help your family members use words that uplift one another.
Say What?!
The use of profanity among young children is on the rise, according to researcher Timothy Jay. Kids no longer learn curse words from peers at school; instead, they hear them at home. Nearly two-thirds of surveyed adults said that despite prohibiting their children from swearing at home, they break their own rules regularly. This double standard confuses and irritates kids, most of whom say they’re frightened when their parents curse.
(www.livescience.com, www.findarticles.com)
Parenting Insights
These guidelines from Children’s Ministry Magazine describe how profanity affects children:
Ages 2 to 5
Preschoolers simply repeat what they hear, so try to limit media exposure. Don’t react to foul language with shock or anger; calmly explain that those words hurt people’s feelings.
Ages 6 to 9
Explain that words are “bad” when they’re used to hurt others. Also explain that misusing God’s name is disrespectful. Tell children we can use God’s name to praise him or pray to him.
Ages 10 to 12
Preteens use profanity to get a reaction from adults and to impress friends. Let them know that obscene language and gestures aren’t acceptable, and teach them discernment to censor their own language.
“Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”
Ephesians 4:29
Words are powerful. God tells us to use language to build people up, not tear them down.
Teachable Moments
1. “Cheer”ful Words—As a family, come up with catchy cheers for praising God. Also create a personalized, encouraging cheer for each family member.
2. It’s All in the Delivery—When speaking, watch your tone and delivery. Say some words short, or staccato, and draw out others. You can also vary the volume. These changes will keep your words interesting to children and just plain fun.
3. Sign Up—Children love to learn sign language, so use motions to reinforce Bible lessons. Check out a library book or video about sign language. Learn how to sign phrases such as “Jesus loves me” or “Jesus is our healer.”
4. Out-of-This-World Names—Help children come up with creative names for God that describe what he’s done for us, such as heart-fixer-upper, happily-dappily-loveful, sunny-joy-rageous.
Explore children’s thoughts about words by asking these discussion questions:
1. Why are words so powerful? How does it feel to know that you can help or hurt someone just by what you say?
2. What do our words say about us? What do they say about God or our relationship with him?
3. Why can it be so hard to tame our tongue? How can we help each other remember to use positive, kind language?
4. What words best describe how you feel about God, and why?
Family Experience: What’s the Word?
Use these devotional ideas to get your family talking about language—and how we use it.
Picture This—Use word pictures to verbally illustrate Bible truths. For example, discuss the importance of having clean thoughts and using clean words, based on 2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV): “We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” Talk about a lasso and how it’s used. Give each family member a small piece of rope and let them tie a lasso. Then discuss what it would be like to “lasso” a bad thought or word.
Speak Up!—Emphasize that God wants us to communicate and work together—even when we all seem to be speaking different languages. You’ll need a bunch of toilet paper rolls, clear cellophane tape, and a slip of paper for each family member with one of these directions written on it: “Say the opposite of what you mean,” “Remain silent and use no body language,” “Gesture with your hands,” “Ask questions,” and “Talk in baby talk.” Have each person take a slip and keep the directions secret. Say: “You have to build a tower as high as you can in three minutes. You’re allowed to communicate only the way your slip of paper instructs.” Afterward, ask: “How did it feel to communicate this way? Have you ever felt like that in our family? Explain.” Read aloud Genesis 11:1-9. Ask: “Why do you think God confused the people’s languages?” Say: “God doesn’t want us to rebel like the people in our story. He wants us to communicate well with our family members and work together.” Close in prayer, asking God to help you all speak in kind, helpful ways.
As the Bible describes in James 3, the tongue may be small, but it can do an awful lot of damage. Unfortunately, name-calling, cursing, bickering, whining, and putdowns find their way into most homes. Yet our words also have the power to heal, mend rifts, encourage other people, and praise God. Proverbs 25:11 (NIV) compares well-chosen and well-timed words to “apples of gold in settings of silver.”
This month’s newsletter explores ways to get your children talking in positive, God-pleasing ways. Use these tips to get started:
Walk the walk, talk the talk. Kids are listening, so watch your own language and model appropriate talk—even when you think little ears aren’t listening.
Teach children how to apologize. Hurtful words can’t be “unsaid,” but people can offer heartfelt apologies and change their ways. Offer examples of how to say sorry, and remember to seek children’s forgiveness when you mess up.
Listen up! Proverbs 10:19 contains valuable advice that often goes unheeded: “Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.” Help children understand the importance of stopping to think before you speak. When in doubt, it’s always better to seal your lips rather than say something you may regret.
Praise God throughout the day. Talk frequently about how good God is and thank him for his many blessings. Share favorite Bible passages, pray with one another, and brainstorm ways you can serve God and other people. When we focus on God and good words, our mouths and lives will bear good fruit.
Ask God:
1. To help you and your kids use positive, God-pleasing words.
2. To guard your tongue from temptations to curse or use his name in vain.
3. To help your family members use words that uplift one another.
Say What?!
The use of profanity among young children is on the rise, according to researcher Timothy Jay. Kids no longer learn curse words from peers at school; instead, they hear them at home. Nearly two-thirds of surveyed adults said that despite prohibiting their children from swearing at home, they break their own rules regularly. This double standard confuses and irritates kids, most of whom say they’re frightened when their parents curse.
(www.livescience.com, www.findarticles.com)
Parenting Insights
These guidelines from Children’s Ministry Magazine describe how profanity affects children:
Ages 2 to 5
Preschoolers simply repeat what they hear, so try to limit media exposure. Don’t react to foul language with shock or anger; calmly explain that those words hurt people’s feelings.
Ages 6 to 9
Explain that words are “bad” when they’re used to hurt others. Also explain that misusing God’s name is disrespectful. Tell children we can use God’s name to praise him or pray to him.
Ages 10 to 12
Preteens use profanity to get a reaction from adults and to impress friends. Let them know that obscene language and gestures aren’t acceptable, and teach them discernment to censor their own language.
“Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”
Ephesians 4:29
Words are powerful. God tells us to use language to build people up, not tear them down.
Teachable Moments
1. “Cheer”ful Words—As a family, come up with catchy cheers for praising God. Also create a personalized, encouraging cheer for each family member.
2. It’s All in the Delivery—When speaking, watch your tone and delivery. Say some words short, or staccato, and draw out others. You can also vary the volume. These changes will keep your words interesting to children and just plain fun.
3. Sign Up—Children love to learn sign language, so use motions to reinforce Bible lessons. Check out a library book or video about sign language. Learn how to sign phrases such as “Jesus loves me” or “Jesus is our healer.”
4. Out-of-This-World Names—Help children come up with creative names for God that describe what he’s done for us, such as heart-fixer-upper, happily-dappily-loveful, sunny-joy-rageous.
Explore children’s thoughts about words by asking these discussion questions:
1. Why are words so powerful? How does it feel to know that you can help or hurt someone just by what you say?
2. What do our words say about us? What do they say about God or our relationship with him?
3. Why can it be so hard to tame our tongue? How can we help each other remember to use positive, kind language?
4. What words best describe how you feel about God, and why?
Family Experience: What’s the Word?
Use these devotional ideas to get your family talking about language—and how we use it.
Picture This—Use word pictures to verbally illustrate Bible truths. For example, discuss the importance of having clean thoughts and using clean words, based on 2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV): “We take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” Talk about a lasso and how it’s used. Give each family member a small piece of rope and let them tie a lasso. Then discuss what it would be like to “lasso” a bad thought or word.
Speak Up!—Emphasize that God wants us to communicate and work together—even when we all seem to be speaking different languages. You’ll need a bunch of toilet paper rolls, clear cellophane tape, and a slip of paper for each family member with one of these directions written on it: “Say the opposite of what you mean,” “Remain silent and use no body language,” “Gesture with your hands,” “Ask questions,” and “Talk in baby talk.” Have each person take a slip and keep the directions secret. Say: “You have to build a tower as high as you can in three minutes. You’re allowed to communicate only the way your slip of paper instructs.” Afterward, ask: “How did it feel to communicate this way? Have you ever felt like that in our family? Explain.” Read aloud Genesis 11:1-9. Ask: “Why do you think God confused the people’s languages?” Say: “God doesn’t want us to rebel like the people in our story. He wants us to communicate well with our family members and work together.” Close in prayer, asking God to help you all speak in kind, helpful ways.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Celebrate Spiritual Milestones
Marking children’s physical “firsts,” such as first steps and first words, is an exciting and memorable part of parenting. Just as important, and just as worthy of celebration, are spiritual firsts, or faith milestones.
These milestones, or rites, help children know they’re growing up as Christians and continually reconnecting to their faith family. Milestones also allow churches and parents to partner together to raise up lifelong followers of Jesus.
Spiritual occasions that warrant family celebrations include:
Baptism or Dedication—Because children are a gift from God, we “give” them back to God by committing their lives to him. By witnessing a baptism or dedication, fellow church members agree to partner with parents to help raise children in the Christian faith.
Receiving a First Bible—When children receive God’s Word, it’s like their very own special love letter from God. He wants us to read the Bible and apply it to our lives. Making a “big deal” out of getting a Bible shows kids how important the book is to our faith and its growth.
Transitioning to the Preteen Years—Leaving behind elementary school symbolizes that preteens are beginning to “own” their faith. Somewhere along their spiritual journey, they’ll decide whether to draw closer to God or reject him. The great thing is that God is always there, waiting for young people to find him. And he’s always there for parents, too, guiding us as we lead our children through faith milestones.
Teachable Moments
1. Celebrate Baptisms—After seeing a baptism, talk to your children about their own baptisms—or their desire to be baptized. Tell them God washes away our sins. As a family, make handmade cards for newly baptized people.
2. Make the Bible Relevant—Show children how God’s Word applies to their lives. Talk about biblical heroes and how they both stumbled and grew in faith. Tie Bible verses into kids’ interests, from music or poetry to travel or adventure.
3. Model Lifelong Learning—Preteens often feel as if they’ve outgrown Sunday school. Provide age-appropriate Bibles and devotionals for preteens who are forming their identity in Christ. Also help them anticipate the future rather than be anxious about it.
Get your children thinking about their own faith milestones by asking these discussion-starter questions:
1. What times or events in your walk with God stand out the most to you, and why?
2. As you grow up as a Christian, what occasions would you like to celebrate, and how?
3. In what ways has your faith changed since you were younger?
4. What can I do to help your faith grow even stronger?
Good Intentions Don’t Always Pan Out
• In a Barna Group survey, 85% of parents said they believe they have the primary responsibility for teaching their children about religious beliefs and spiritual matters.
• But in another Barna study, fewer than 10% of parents who regularly attend church have consistent family time with God.
Ask God:
1. To help you nurture your children’s developing faith.
2. To show your children how he’s with them as they grow.
3. To help you make faith milestones important.
Parenting Insights
In Shift (Group), Brian Haynes discusses the value of at-home “Faith Talks” for leading kids spiritually:
1. Faith Talks should occur regularly and be age-appropriate. Each week, set aside time to focus on biblical truth in a relational way.
2. Faith Talks should focus on God’s Word. Read the Bible together, celebrate it, and adjust your lives accordingly.
3. Faith Talks don’t have to be difficult or formal. Make them fun; for example, go outside on a hot day and compare standing in the sun and shade. Then read and discuss Psalm 121:5.
4. Faith Talks are a priority. They shouldn’t depend on children’s choices or attitudes. God instructs parents to be intentional about leading their children spiritually.
Family Experience: Journeys With Jesus
Use these activities to celebrate your family’s past and future.
• Family Timelines—You’ll need a 6-foot piece of butcher paper, markers, masking tape, and a Bible. Tape the butcher paper to a wall. Together, create a timeline of your family’s journey with God using words, drawings, and Bible verses. Include marriages, birthdays, and milestones, such as when a child entered preschool or when you moved. Add fun memories and difficult times that affected everyone (illnesses or injuries, vacations, job or school changes, and so on).
Afterward, discuss these questions: “What are our best memories? What difficult events have we overcome? How did those events make us closer? How have you seen God moving in our family through the years? How have we experienced God’s faithfulness? What are our future dreams for our family?”
• God’s Path—You’ll need a map of your hometown, a highlighter, a Bible, and a red marker. Mark important spots on the map, such as your home, school, church, friends’ houses, and more. Highlight the roads your family uses most often. Read aloud Psalm 139:1-3. Say: “God always knows where we are, what we’re doing, and where we’re going. He has big plans for us as we grow and get to know him better. God loves us and will always be with us.” With a red marker, draw a large heart around all the map sites you’ve highlighted. Hang up the map as a reminder of God’s promises.
Marking children’s physical “firsts,” such as first steps and first words, is an exciting and memorable part of parenting. Just as important, and just as worthy of celebration, are spiritual firsts, or faith milestones.
These milestones, or rites, help children know they’re growing up as Christians and continually reconnecting to their faith family. Milestones also allow churches and parents to partner together to raise up lifelong followers of Jesus.
Spiritual occasions that warrant family celebrations include:
Baptism or Dedication—Because children are a gift from God, we “give” them back to God by committing their lives to him. By witnessing a baptism or dedication, fellow church members agree to partner with parents to help raise children in the Christian faith.
Receiving a First Bible—When children receive God’s Word, it’s like their very own special love letter from God. He wants us to read the Bible and apply it to our lives. Making a “big deal” out of getting a Bible shows kids how important the book is to our faith and its growth.
Transitioning to the Preteen Years—Leaving behind elementary school symbolizes that preteens are beginning to “own” their faith. Somewhere along their spiritual journey, they’ll decide whether to draw closer to God or reject him. The great thing is that God is always there, waiting for young people to find him. And he’s always there for parents, too, guiding us as we lead our children through faith milestones.
Teachable Moments
1. Celebrate Baptisms—After seeing a baptism, talk to your children about their own baptisms—or their desire to be baptized. Tell them God washes away our sins. As a family, make handmade cards for newly baptized people.
2. Make the Bible Relevant—Show children how God’s Word applies to their lives. Talk about biblical heroes and how they both stumbled and grew in faith. Tie Bible verses into kids’ interests, from music or poetry to travel or adventure.
3. Model Lifelong Learning—Preteens often feel as if they’ve outgrown Sunday school. Provide age-appropriate Bibles and devotionals for preteens who are forming their identity in Christ. Also help them anticipate the future rather than be anxious about it.
Get your children thinking about their own faith milestones by asking these discussion-starter questions:
1. What times or events in your walk with God stand out the most to you, and why?
2. As you grow up as a Christian, what occasions would you like to celebrate, and how?
3. In what ways has your faith changed since you were younger?
4. What can I do to help your faith grow even stronger?
Good Intentions Don’t Always Pan Out
• In a Barna Group survey, 85% of parents said they believe they have the primary responsibility for teaching their children about religious beliefs and spiritual matters.
• But in another Barna study, fewer than 10% of parents who regularly attend church have consistent family time with God.
Ask God:
1. To help you nurture your children’s developing faith.
2. To show your children how he’s with them as they grow.
3. To help you make faith milestones important.
Parenting Insights
In Shift (Group), Brian Haynes discusses the value of at-home “Faith Talks” for leading kids spiritually:
1. Faith Talks should occur regularly and be age-appropriate. Each week, set aside time to focus on biblical truth in a relational way.
2. Faith Talks should focus on God’s Word. Read the Bible together, celebrate it, and adjust your lives accordingly.
3. Faith Talks don’t have to be difficult or formal. Make them fun; for example, go outside on a hot day and compare standing in the sun and shade. Then read and discuss Psalm 121:5.
4. Faith Talks are a priority. They shouldn’t depend on children’s choices or attitudes. God instructs parents to be intentional about leading their children spiritually.
Family Experience: Journeys With Jesus
Use these activities to celebrate your family’s past and future.
• Family Timelines—You’ll need a 6-foot piece of butcher paper, markers, masking tape, and a Bible. Tape the butcher paper to a wall. Together, create a timeline of your family’s journey with God using words, drawings, and Bible verses. Include marriages, birthdays, and milestones, such as when a child entered preschool or when you moved. Add fun memories and difficult times that affected everyone (illnesses or injuries, vacations, job or school changes, and so on).
Afterward, discuss these questions: “What are our best memories? What difficult events have we overcome? How did those events make us closer? How have you seen God moving in our family through the years? How have we experienced God’s faithfulness? What are our future dreams for our family?”
• God’s Path—You’ll need a map of your hometown, a highlighter, a Bible, and a red marker. Mark important spots on the map, such as your home, school, church, friends’ houses, and more. Highlight the roads your family uses most often. Read aloud Psalm 139:1-3. Say: “God always knows where we are, what we’re doing, and where we’re going. He has big plans for us as we grow and get to know him better. God loves us and will always be with us.” With a red marker, draw a large heart around all the map sites you’ve highlighted. Hang up the map as a reminder of God’s promises.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Make Faith-Friendly Resolutions
The beginning of a new year offers the promise of a fresh start. Many people celebrate by resolving to make changes, often related to how they care for their bodies.
This year, take time to reflect on what you can do differently in your home to strengthen your family—and each member’s faith in God. Use these ideas to transform your family in 2011:
***Begin the day with music. Mornings are hectic in most houses. Play some soft Christian music to wake everyone up and to set the tone for a calm, God-directed day.
***Reclaim mealtime. Eat together as often as possible. Research points to all kinds of child-development benefits from this practice. But family meals also help you get to know one another better—and provide opportunities for faith growth. For example, ask specific, open-ended questions, such as “What’s the best thing that happened to you today? the worst?”
***Make devotions fun and active. Bible reading should be a social, bonding opportunity, not a dry discipline devoid of purpose. Use resources such as the “Family Night Tool Chest” series by Jim Weidmann and others (Chariot Victor), the “Not-So-Quiet Times” devotion series by Tracy Harrast (Standard), and 52 Fun Family Devotions by Mike and Amy Nappa (Augsburg Fortress).
***Develop a family mission statement. As a family, pinpoint your worthy purposes, worthy visions, and worthy values. A mission statement will unite you because everyone gives input into your family’s “big picture.” And God will be placed at the center of your home on purpose, not by chance.
__________________________________________________________
Start a Parenting Revolution
According to research by the Barna Group, fewer than 10 percent of parents who regularly attend church have consistent family time with God. George Barna’s book Revolutionary Parenting applies modern-day research to show that parents who faithfully apply God’s instructions for family life raise spiritual champions. Unfortunately, most people parent “by default” or use “trial-and-error parenting,” according to Barna.
Ask God:
1. To bless and guide your family during the year ahead.
2. To help you all embrace new habits so you grow closer to God and each other.
3. To grow each family member’s faith this year.
_______________________________________________
Parenting Insights
Thom Schultz, president of Group Publishing, offers these tips for helping children’s faith take root:
1. See the sacred in the ordinary. Attach "God thoughts" to daily activities. Bathing a child can remind you of baptism, and talking with one another can remind you of the gift of prayer.
2. Be alert to teachable moments. Put up your “God antennae.” For example, use the media as a teaching tool that sparks discussions.
3. Just “be” with your kids. Simply be present without an agenda. When you stop trying so hard, it’s freeing—and you’ll actually relate better.
4. Realize your family doesn’t have to be perfect. Read the Bible together to see that God’s grace was—and still is— sufficient for imperfect people.
“Anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”
2 Corinthians 5:17
Jesus offers us a fresh start not only on New Year’s but each and every day. By paying the price for our sins, Jesus made each of his children a new creation.
_______________________________________________________
Teachable Moments
1. Keep It Short—You can make a big impact even when you’re short on time. For example, read aloud one Bible verse at the breakfast table to start the day. At bedtime, tell a Bible story in your own words. Remember: “Short passages for short people.”
2. Take a Pause—Your family doesn’t always need to be on the go. This year, make it a priority to step away from some commitments and shorten your to-do list. Use the extra time to regroup, reconnect, and recharge.
3. Be Peacemakers—If one of your goals is less sibling conflict, help redirect tension by focusing on positive qualities. Whenever one family member is mean-spirited to another, have the offender say or write three things he or she appreciates about the other person. This will make your family more tenderhearted and thankful for one another.
********************************************************************
Begin a conversation with your children about the new year by asking them these questions:
1. What excites you the most about the new year, and why? What are you the most uncertain about, and why?
2. What are some things you want to do differently or change in the upcoming year?
3. What types of goals do you think our family should set, and how can we work together to meet them?
4. What are your suggestions for a family mission statement? What best describes who we are and what we want to do?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Family Experience: A Fresh Start
Celebrate new beginnings with these Bible-based activities:
• Goal Tenders. Hold up an empty bowl and say, “This bowl reminds me of a new year, ready to be filled with new experiences and people.” Hand each family some buttons and say, “Let’s pretend these represent all those fun things. Your goal is to toss the buttons into the empty bowl from three feet away.”
After everyone has a turn, say, “A new year is a good time to set goals, but achieving them takes persistence. God gives us each a special goal to strive for every day, week, month, and year.” Read aloud Philippians 3:12-14 and discuss the goal of becoming what God wants us to be—and how we can pursue it. Close by having family members each toss one button into the bowl while thinking of a way to become what God wants them to be (for example, praying more often, being kind to others, etc.).
• Presto Chango!—Mix two parts glue with one part liquid starch. Stir well. Continue adding starch one spoonful at a time, using your fingers to work the mixture into a smooth putty. Press the putty onto a colored comic picture and then pull it off. Say, “This putty was plain, but it changed when it came into contact with the picture.” Read aloud 2 Corinthians 5:17. Say, “When we believe in Jesus, the Holy Spirit lives in us and changes us. He helps us meet our goal of becoming more like Jesus.” Close in prayer, thanking God for the gift of a new year and for giving us new life in him.
The beginning of a new year offers the promise of a fresh start. Many people celebrate by resolving to make changes, often related to how they care for their bodies.
This year, take time to reflect on what you can do differently in your home to strengthen your family—and each member’s faith in God. Use these ideas to transform your family in 2011:
***Begin the day with music. Mornings are hectic in most houses. Play some soft Christian music to wake everyone up and to set the tone for a calm, God-directed day.
***Reclaim mealtime. Eat together as often as possible. Research points to all kinds of child-development benefits from this practice. But family meals also help you get to know one another better—and provide opportunities for faith growth. For example, ask specific, open-ended questions, such as “What’s the best thing that happened to you today? the worst?”
***Make devotions fun and active. Bible reading should be a social, bonding opportunity, not a dry discipline devoid of purpose. Use resources such as the “Family Night Tool Chest” series by Jim Weidmann and others (Chariot Victor), the “Not-So-Quiet Times” devotion series by Tracy Harrast (Standard), and 52 Fun Family Devotions by Mike and Amy Nappa (Augsburg Fortress).
***Develop a family mission statement. As a family, pinpoint your worthy purposes, worthy visions, and worthy values. A mission statement will unite you because everyone gives input into your family’s “big picture.” And God will be placed at the center of your home on purpose, not by chance.
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Start a Parenting Revolution
According to research by the Barna Group, fewer than 10 percent of parents who regularly attend church have consistent family time with God. George Barna’s book Revolutionary Parenting applies modern-day research to show that parents who faithfully apply God’s instructions for family life raise spiritual champions. Unfortunately, most people parent “by default” or use “trial-and-error parenting,” according to Barna.
Ask God:
1. To bless and guide your family during the year ahead.
2. To help you all embrace new habits so you grow closer to God and each other.
3. To grow each family member’s faith this year.
_______________________________________________
Parenting Insights
Thom Schultz, president of Group Publishing, offers these tips for helping children’s faith take root:
1. See the sacred in the ordinary. Attach "God thoughts" to daily activities. Bathing a child can remind you of baptism, and talking with one another can remind you of the gift of prayer.
2. Be alert to teachable moments. Put up your “God antennae.” For example, use the media as a teaching tool that sparks discussions.
3. Just “be” with your kids. Simply be present without an agenda. When you stop trying so hard, it’s freeing—and you’ll actually relate better.
4. Realize your family doesn’t have to be perfect. Read the Bible together to see that God’s grace was—and still is— sufficient for imperfect people.
“Anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!”
2 Corinthians 5:17
Jesus offers us a fresh start not only on New Year’s but each and every day. By paying the price for our sins, Jesus made each of his children a new creation.
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Teachable Moments
1. Keep It Short—You can make a big impact even when you’re short on time. For example, read aloud one Bible verse at the breakfast table to start the day. At bedtime, tell a Bible story in your own words. Remember: “Short passages for short people.”
2. Take a Pause—Your family doesn’t always need to be on the go. This year, make it a priority to step away from some commitments and shorten your to-do list. Use the extra time to regroup, reconnect, and recharge.
3. Be Peacemakers—If one of your goals is less sibling conflict, help redirect tension by focusing on positive qualities. Whenever one family member is mean-spirited to another, have the offender say or write three things he or she appreciates about the other person. This will make your family more tenderhearted and thankful for one another.
********************************************************************
Begin a conversation with your children about the new year by asking them these questions:
1. What excites you the most about the new year, and why? What are you the most uncertain about, and why?
2. What are some things you want to do differently or change in the upcoming year?
3. What types of goals do you think our family should set, and how can we work together to meet them?
4. What are your suggestions for a family mission statement? What best describes who we are and what we want to do?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Family Experience: A Fresh Start
Celebrate new beginnings with these Bible-based activities:
• Goal Tenders. Hold up an empty bowl and say, “This bowl reminds me of a new year, ready to be filled with new experiences and people.” Hand each family some buttons and say, “Let’s pretend these represent all those fun things. Your goal is to toss the buttons into the empty bowl from three feet away.”
After everyone has a turn, say, “A new year is a good time to set goals, but achieving them takes persistence. God gives us each a special goal to strive for every day, week, month, and year.” Read aloud Philippians 3:12-14 and discuss the goal of becoming what God wants us to be—and how we can pursue it. Close by having family members each toss one button into the bowl while thinking of a way to become what God wants them to be (for example, praying more often, being kind to others, etc.).
• Presto Chango!—Mix two parts glue with one part liquid starch. Stir well. Continue adding starch one spoonful at a time, using your fingers to work the mixture into a smooth putty. Press the putty onto a colored comic picture and then pull it off. Say, “This putty was plain, but it changed when it came into contact with the picture.” Read aloud 2 Corinthians 5:17. Say, “When we believe in Jesus, the Holy Spirit lives in us and changes us. He helps us meet our goal of becoming more like Jesus.” Close in prayer, thanking God for the gift of a new year and for giving us new life in him.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Reduce Possession-Obsession
For many families, it’s a necessary pre-Christmas ritual: weeding through the old toys just to make room for new ones. Children typically have so much “stuff” they can’t keep track of or play with it all. When possessions become a priority, it’s time to re-evaluate your family’s stance on stuff.
Many of us keep materialism in check most of the year but then slip at Christmas. Although presents aren’t bad, you can ease the focus on materialism this season. For example:
**Remind your children that Jesus is our best gift. Make sure they know that Christmas is Jesus’ birthday and that God sent Jesus because he loves us. When you decorate for Christmas, leave a nativity scene manger empty. Wrap the baby Jesus figurine in a special box and open it on Christmas Eve. Then read Romans 6:23b: “The free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.”
**Discuss the gifts we can give to God. Talk about how you respond when someone gives you a nice gift. Ask children what they can do that God would really like, such as pray or tell a friend about him. As a family, fill out gift cards listing what you can each give to God. Then hang the cards from your Christmas tree or wrap them and place them under your tree as gifts to God.
**Encourage children to be generous. Emphasize the importance of giving, not receiving. As a family, participate in a service project for people in need. Help children experience the joy of giving by donating some time and money to others. Talk about how it feels to give, and discuss some ways you can continue doing so in the year ahead.
________________________________________________________________
Buy Buy!
• Each year, 8 to 12 year olds spend $30 billion of their own money and influence another $150 billion of parental spending.
(cbsnews.com)
• The negative effects of rampant materialism can be tempered by teaching kids to appreciate what they have. Preteens and teens who are both highly materialistic and highly thankful say they like to spend time helping others. (Harris Interactive)
Ask God:
1. To help your family focus on Jesus’ birth this Christmas.
2. To reduce your emphasis on buying and receiving.
3. To help your children treasure God, not earthly things.
___________________________________________________________________
Parenting Insights
Despite tough economic times, you can still have a special Christmas. Child-development expert Wanda Draper says, “Celebrating a more modest Christmas materially can be a blessing in disguise.” She offers these tips for easing materialism:
1. Don’t apologize for a reduced number of gifts. Just “say it will be a new kind of Christmas,” Draper says.
2. Discuss how everyone wants to celebrate. Recall previous holidays and what was special to each person.
3. Create homemade gifts for family members and friends. Making the gifts together can lead to even more great memories.
4. Give children an active role. Let them take part in Advent devotions, decorating, baking, caroling, and more.
“Beware! Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how much you own.”
Luke 12:15
___________________________________________________________________
Our earthly possessions won’t matter or be of any use when our lives end. As Luke 12:21 says, the only thing that matters is having “a rich relationship with God.”
_____________________________________________________________________________
Teachable Moments
1. It’s a Boy!—Create a birth announcement for Jesus, complete with a baby footprint, if you have or know a newborn. Read Luke 1:35-38 and discuss how Mary reacted when she found out she was going to be Jesus’ mother.
2. 12 Days of Christmas—As a family, come up with 12 acts of service you can perform together during December. For example, shovel snow for a neighbor, donate extra blankets to a homeless shelter, and deliver cookies and cocoa to homebound seniors.
3. Shine On—Read Matthew 2:2, about the Christmas star. Cut out poster board stars and paint your names on them with glow-in-the-dark paint. Tape the stars to the ceiling above your Christmas tree. Turn off the lights and share ways you can guide others to Jesus, the best gift of all.
Take inventory of your children’s thoughts about “stuff” by asking these discussion-starter questions:
1. How can a person tell when he or she has too much stuff? How should you decide what to keep and what to give away?
2. How important are presents to you at Christmas time? How would the holiday be different if we didn’t exchange gifts?
3. What does it feel like to give someone a special gift? How do you expect a person to respond when you offer them a present?
4. What are some of the best gifts you’ve ever received? How is Jesus a gift from God?
___________________________________________________________________
Family Experience: Reason for the Season
Take a break from shopping to focus on what happened on that “Silent Night” in Bethlehem more than 2,000 years ago.
• Celebrate Stillness—Gather several CD or music players and some Christmas music. Give everyone an index card and a pencil. Ask family members to write or draw what they’d like for Christmas. As they begin, play different Christmas music on all the players at the same time, at a loud volume. After one minute, stop the music. Say: “Now let’s focus on something else, without the distraction.” Place a figure of baby Jesus in front of family members and say, “For one minute, pray silently and ask God to show you what’s important about Christmas.” When time is up, ask: “What answers did you come up with? How was the noisy music like what often happens at Christmas?” Close in prayer, asking God to help your family find time to be quiet and thankful this season.
• Bring the Story to Life—Have family members choose different characters in the Christmas account. Together, write and present a short drama based on each character’s experiences. Discuss the different people’s perspectives and why Christmas was important to each of them. Make simple costumes. Videotape the play and watch it while enjoying Christmas cookies. You may also want to post the video on a video-sharing site and send the link to family and friends as part of your annual Christmas greeting.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Nurture Grateful Young Servants
November is the perfect time to transform our gratitude to God into acts of generosity toward others. These don’t always have to be “big” acts. William Wordsworth said “the best portions” of a good person’s life are his or her “little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love.”
With some support from you, the little children in your life can make a big difference in the lives of other people. Here are some ideas to encourage gratitude and service:
Make serving fun. Spend an afternoon raking up leaves for elderly neighbors or church members. Afterward, dump a bag of the leaves on your own lawn, and throw some individually wrapped candy into the pile. After children search for the candy, discuss what makes helping others feel so “sweet.”
Enlist children in the Christian Secret Service (CSS). Deploy kids for undercover operations by having them serve others covertly. For example, they can leave sidewalk-chalk messages for neighbors, deliver cards at a local nursing home, or pick up trash at their favorite park.
Share your adventures in serving. During November and December, challenge family members to perform acts of giving and kindness. Then report the activities every night during dinner or family devotions. These can range from shoveling snow and delivering cookies to leaving a close-to-the-door parking spot open at the mall or helping someone carry his or her packages.
November is the perfect time to transform our gratitude to God into acts of generosity toward others. These don’t always have to be “big” acts. William Wordsworth said “the best portions” of a good person’s life are his or her “little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love.”
With some support from you, the little children in your life can make a big difference in the lives of other people. Here are some ideas to encourage gratitude and service:
Make serving fun. Spend an afternoon raking up leaves for elderly neighbors or church members. Afterward, dump a bag of the leaves on your own lawn, and throw some individually wrapped candy into the pile. After children search for the candy, discuss what makes helping others feel so “sweet.”
Enlist children in the Christian Secret Service (CSS). Deploy kids for undercover operations by having them serve others covertly. For example, they can leave sidewalk-chalk messages for neighbors, deliver cards at a local nursing home, or pick up trash at their favorite park.
Share your adventures in serving. During November and December, challenge family members to perform acts of giving and kindness. Then report the activities every night during dinner or family devotions. These can range from shoveling snow and delivering cookies to leaving a close-to-the-door parking spot open at the mall or helping someone carry his or her packages.
____________________________________________
Thoughts About Thankfulness
In a poll conducted last Thanksgiving, 41% of American adults said that after family and health, they’re most thankful for their religious faith. Adults over age 40 are more thankful for their religion than younger people are.
(Rasmussen Reports)
78% of Americans think the actions of one person can improve the world. The same number also believes they’re more involved in making a difference than their parents were.
(Parade)
Ask God:
* To give your children grateful hearts for all their blessings.
* To provide opportunities for your family to serve together.
* To make service a joyful, regular habit in your home.
Parenting Insights
In The Five Love Languages of Children, Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell note that “parenting is a service-oriented vocation.” They offer tips for parents whose kids feel loved through acts of service that others perform for them:
Set a model of servanthood and responsibility. Don’t use acts of service to manipulate children or to offer them things that aren’t best for them or your family.
Keep acts of service age-appropriate. Don’t do things for children that they should be doing for themselves. As kids become ready, teach them how to serve themselves and then others.
Perform an attitude check. Remember that loving service is a gift. Daily, “mundane” tasks that parents perform for children are expressions of love that have long-term effects on children.
“Whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone—especially to those in the family of faith.” Galatians 6:10
God wants us to act out our gratitude every day through “thanksliving,” an attitude of gratitude that shows itself through service to others.
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Teachable Moments
Read Up—For babies and toddlers, read aloud picture books about thankfulness, such as Thank You, God, for Everything by August Gold and Thankfulness by Cynthia Roberts. Talk about ways we say thank you to God and other people.
Pop Up—For preschoolers, play a game to express thankfulness. Have all family members crouch down on the floor. Then have people pop up randomly—and often—to say what they’re thankful for. Play another round, popping up to say how you can help others.
Sing Your Thanks—Visit www.group.com/groupmusic for free music downloads and more fun, simple activities to increase your family’s thankfulness. Also check out the “GroupMusic” Facebook page to suggest your own ideas for easy family activities about gratitude and Thanksgiving.
Start a conversation with your children about gratitude and servanthood by asking these discussion-starter questions:
What are some blessings God has given you? What blessings do you sometimes take for granted or forget to thank God for?
How do you show God that you appreciate his gifts? How can we thank someone we can’t see?
When you’re thankful, how does that make you want to act?
Why does God want us to help and serve other people? What are some ways we can do that as individuals? as a family?
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Family Experience: Service With a Smile
Try these activities from Group’s Hands-On Bible to help your family members explore ways to put thankfulness into action:
Food From Heaven—Use spoons to launch small marshmallows into one another’s mouths. Say: “We just fed each other in an amazing way. God fed his people in an amazing way, too.” Read aloud Exodus 16:11-21. Talk about how God provided for the Israelites and how he provides for your family. Add some leftover marshmallows to dried cereal, nuts, raisins, or pretzels to make a tasty “manna mix.” Ask: “What would it be like to gather your food off the ground each day? How can we help people who need food or other necessities?” Assemble a bag of nonperishable groceries and deliver it to a local food bank. Or make another batch of manna mix and give it to a family who needs encouragement. Tell this family you’re praying for them and that God cares about their needs.
Follow His Example—Have everyone take off their socks and shoes. Read aloud John 13:1-15, about Jesus washing his disciples’ feet. Say: “In Bible times, servants washed the dirty feet of guests. It was a lowly job, but Jesus did it to show that we should serve others.” Take turns giving one another foot massages. Ask: “Why was Jesus willing to be a servant? How can we encourage each other to remember to serve?” Have family members use permanent markers to write on a light-colored towel the name of someone they’d like to serve. Hang the towel in the bathroom as a reminder to follow through on your service ideas.
Culture & Trends
What’s happening right now that may affect your children and family:
Children are swearing earlier than ever, due to a rise in vulgarity among adults. Swearing “really takes off” between ages 3 and 4, says researcher Timothy Jay.
(www.livescience.com)
Almost all (92%) of U.S. babies and toddlers now have a “digital footprint,” thanks to photo-sharing and social-networking sites.
(CNN.com)
______________
Quick Stats
Two-thirds of adults with no-swear policies for children break their own rules.
(www.livescience.com)
Today’s children have 12 fewer hours of free time a week than kids did in the 1980s. (Univ. of Michigan)
Physically fit 9 and 10 year olds have bigger brain volumes and outperform out-of-shape peers on memory tests.
(Brain Research)
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
October 2010
Protect Kids From False Beliefs
Many parents worry about shielding their children from dangerous non-Christian influences. This is especially true at Halloween, which has become a $6 billion holiday. Because of the costumes and candy, most children adore Halloween. But parents face a dilemma: How much should children participate in a holiday that focuses on scary images often glamorizing death and the occult?
Avoiding Halloween entirely is one option. Another is providing Christian alternatives such as harvest events. Parents can also provide children with a faith-based understanding of Halloween. You can use the holiday to discover the differences between God’s truth and false beliefs. Here are ways to start:
***Explore children’s fears regarding death. Kids often ask tough questions that make adults uncomfortable. When topics such as death and the devil arise, let your home be a safe place where children can express their fears. Then turn to the Bible for answers.
***Share with children the history of Halloween. The holiday first marked the eve of All Hallows or All Saints’ Day, when Christians remember saints who’ve died. Talk about special family members or friends who are now in heaven with Jesus. Also share that all who believe in Jesus are called to be saints, or holy people (see Romans 1:7).
***Put on the “armor of God” as protection against evil. Read aloud Ephesians 6:10-20 and discuss how God keeps us safe. Let children dress up in this armor; for example, wear the belt of truth to recognize Satan’s lies and resist his temptations.
Trick or Truth?
• According to a recent Gallup Poll, one in 10 Americans objects to celebrating Halloween because of religious beliefs. In a poll at about.com, 40% of respondents said Halloween activities are harmless and fun.
• At edutopia.org, 52% of poll respondents said public schools should celebrate Halloween and that children whose parents object should be excused from the festivities. Another 41% said an alternative seasonal festival should include everyone.
Ask God:
1. To help you teach and remind children of God’s truths.
2. To protect your children from evil forces and activities.
3. To help your children learn to resist Satan’s temptations.
Parenting Insights
Start now to safeguard children against being misled by the false teachings of cults.
1. Love and accept children unconditionally. Show them that church is the place to find God’s love and acceptance.
2. Teach children to think critically. They must know what they believe and why.
3. Expect and encourage kids to question their faith. Doubts help spur faith growth.
4. Teach kids to understand the Bible. Always look at the context of verses.
5. Talk to children about false religions. Otherwise, they’ll be unprepared to evaluate and respond to cults when they’re out on their own.
6. Pray and trust the Holy Spirit. God promises to keep his children safe in his truth.
“Jesus told him, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.”
John 14:6
Jesus, our Savior, is the only source of truth and the only way to eternal life.
Teachable Moments
1. Bible Villains—Put a biblical spin on children’s interest in “bad guys” by learning more about Bible-time villains such as Pharaoh, Goliath, Bathsheba, Delilah, Haman, Pilate, and Judas. Discuss these people’s actions and how we can avoid being like them.
2. Reverse Trick or Treat—Surprise neighbors with an unexpected act of kindness. Bake some goodies and deliver them by ringing doorbells and saying, “Reverse trick or treat!” As you walk from home to home, talk about biblical truths such as the Golden Rule—and why God tells us to love our neighbors.
3. Let It Shine—Make some luminarias by decorating brown paper sacks and filling them each with sand and a votive candle. Line them along your sidewalk to light a path to faith in Christ at Halloween. Read aloud Isaiah 9:2 and share ways you can help others see the light of Jesus all year long.
Talk about children’s fears and beliefs by using these conversation-starting questions:
1. What kinds of things frighten you the most, and why? Why do you think Jesus tells us to not be afraid (see John 6:20)?
2. What makes you feel better when you’re scared? How do you comfort other people when they’re facing fears?
3. How can you tell when other people are telling the truth?
4. Why does Jesus want us to live according to his truth found in the Bible? How can we make sure we do that?
Family Experience: Nothing But the Truth
Use these activities to discover where we can find real truth. The first works well with younger children, and the second works well with older children.
• Pumpkin Matchup—Remove the seeds and pulp from two pumpkins. Carve them together, reserving large pieces from your designs. Place all the pieces on a tray in the center of the room. Place the carved pumpkins at opposite ends of the room. Then form two teams and have teams each stand by a pumpkin. Say: “Let’s complete our pumpkins. Race to match your team’s pieces to your pumpkin. If a piece doesn’t fit, return it to the pile. Afterward, say: “It isn’t always easy to find the right match for things.” Read 1 John 2:5. Say: “Jesus wants us to do things that match up with the Bible. Following Jesus makes us complete.”
• Searching for the Truth—Fill a large tub with ice cubes and 20 or 30 clear marbles. Have family members try to pick up the marbles with their bare toes. Ask: “How easy or difficult was this task? How were the marbles different from or similar to the ice? How is distinguishing between marbles and ice cubes with your toes like or unlike deciding what’s true and what isn’t?” Say: “What’s false often looks or feels like truth. Just as our feet got cold and numb from the ice while we were looking for the marbles, sometimes false things can make us numb to the truth. The best way to know truth is to pick up and hold on to God’s Word.” Read aloud Psalm 119:105 and discuss ways that God’s Word lights our path and warms our hearts. Then enjoy a warm snack.
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